My father used to say, “The only thing dumber than a woman is two of them.” Even though I saw that was stupid when I was a child, there is some truth to it. We are all dumb, be it male or female. When there are two people, it doubles the dumbness; the more people, the dumber the group.
We are a whole world of conditioned robots. If the group is homogeneous, such as a group of women, then they will tend to agree with their beliefs and reinforce them. I call it the “woman’s club.” Also, there is the “men’s club.” When men or women congregate together, they tend to agree about certain things, especially about the opposite sex.
Females throughout history have been beaten down, downtrodden, and have been made to be stupid. All females are at the effect of this history. It is part of our society to consider females stupid. This is part of the male domination to make sure women do not try to take over. This bias has been passed down from generation to generation, and it doesn’t only come from the males, it comes from the females of the prior generations as well as they bought into the conditioning and passed it on to their children. Although it is not true that women are dumber, many societies believe that is true, and both sexes perpetuate that belief.
This gender gap in our society is changing with women getting more involved in business and government, holding higher positions, and seen as authority figures. Yet, they are trying to compete in the man’s world, made up of men’s game with their rules, so they are trying to do it in a man’s way. They are bringing in the female energy by virtue of them being female, yet rather than creating a new way they are actually strengthening the male way. The only females that can really succeed in the male world have to give up their femaleness in order to do it.
And, they are still expected to do all cooking, cleaning, laundry and the home jobs that females have been doing for thousands of years. Many of the females who go into the corporate or political fields often leave it because they cannot do it all, or they become mothers and want to be home with their children. Sometimes they just get fed up with the male games they are forced to play. So, then they are back in the traditional, conditioned female role.
Often males do not want to be with a female who is smart, especially if she is smarter than they are. They feel uncomfortable when this happens. They don’t want a female to have a better job or make more money than they do. So, females dumb it up in order to be able to find a male to be with.
Some of these things appear to be changing now, but are they really? Females are competing in the male world, on male terms. The female energy is being lost, and they are trying to be males rather than be a female in business or politics.
The dumb blonde jokes don’t help things either. And, it seems that many females feel they have to act dumb in order to be with a man. Maybe females bought into the idea that they are dumber and believe it themselves. TV also fosters this with many shows, especially the reality TV shows of females being very dumb and petty and gossipy, e.g., the “Real Housewives” shows. There is also a benefit that females get for acting dumb. They aren’t expected to know how to do a lot jobs, and they use that as their excuse for getting out of doing them. This is especially true when they want something to be done around the house.
It is possible that males actually feel inferior to females, so they need to put them down to make themselves feel better, so they have to keep “beating” this belief into the female until she finally believes it herself.
In our society, money is another gauge of who is the smartest, and males tend to have that, which reinforces that belief. It seems that rich males tend to be more attracted to females who are pretty and dumb. It’s a man’s world that men have put together, so they will obviously be the ones they would make as superior. It was put together in the manner in which men operate—“the good ol boy’s club.”
The term wears the pants in the family is another conditioned belief indicating that that male is dominate in a relationship because men always wore pants. Then the confusion comes in with the assumption that if he is the dominate one, he is the smartest one as well. The female often pretends to be dumb in order to stay in the relationship, and then she will fall into the trap of actually believing that she is the dumb one.
Many females have a fear of giving up control to a male. They have been “beaten down” and forced (often physically and almost definitely psychologically), and they fear if they give up control, they will be hurt or even killed. In order for them to receive, those barriers need to be taken down.
Sometimes there is an attraction issue between two people in a relationship. One is overweight or not keeping up how they look. Many people want to be accepted for who they are, not what they look like. Yet, if you have that thought, take a look at who you are. I am not talking about how you physically look. I am talking about your anger, your pettiness, your need to be right, or your control issues. Would you want to live with someone who is like that? Would you accept yourself that way? Yet, you want them to accept you because you cannot accept yourself. Before anyone else can accept you, you need to accept yourself first. When you can see your true self, the self without all of the added feelings, you will attract someone who will accept you as well.
I had someone tell me that when she was married, she realized that she could not be happy until her husband was happy, and it was her job to make him happy. How could she make him happy if she was not happy? Not only is it crazy to want to be happy, as wanting something you don’t have definitely keeps the craziness going in a perpetual cycle going nowhere. She wasn’t happy so all she could give was misery and suffering (what she was feeling).
Everyone is willing to let the other person do whatever they can for them. If it is considered a job, then it isn’t really giving. That’s slavery. She said she realized it was a “wife program” that she was reacting to, and she felt stuck in it.
My wife was stuck in something similar; she had a programmed belief that she was never to say no to me, that she was to be the good wife. Her mother said that if she said “no” to her husband then you will end up divorced. We did end up divorced anyway.
It is prevalent that competitiveness and control issues exist between males and females. Both sides are working on control issues rather than getting along with each other. It is a constant battle of who has control, and actually working on the relationship might mean losing control. They would have to work on cooperating, and many folks would rather be in control rather than get along.
Males and females have been in competition with each other since the beginning of time, which makes them both equally dumb. In order for the male and the female to be together 100 percent, it takes giving yourself 100 percent to the other person. That is what it takes, I say.
The problem is that no one knows what being 100 percent is. If a person is not giving 100 percent, then they are giving a partial gift and holding back the rest. Giving all you have would also require trust on both sides. This could be translated to equality in sexual activity of the two in partnership together — to give to each other 100%. A total giving would increase the energy in both people. If there is only a partial giving, there is not much satisfaction on either side.
The only manner in which you can give yourself completely is when the other person can accept it, and the only way they can accept it is if they are giving 100 percent, also. If they are taking, there is not complete giving. Often, one of the partners feels obligated, prostituted, or even forced to have sex. This is definitely an imbalance in the partnership; therefore, it is not 100 percent anything except perhaps dominance and/or duty.
Most people seldom ever say, “You are welcome” when someone says, “Thank you.” They often just say, “Thank you” back without really accepting the original thank you. You can hear this often on TV when a host says to a guest, “Thank you for being here.” The reply they usually get is a “Thank you” back. They haven’t received the compliment 100 percent.
To give and receive 100 percent from each other requires giving up of control and competition. It also requires accepting with grace and trust. This would eliminate the separation between the sexes and bring about the beginning of a life free of war and violence.